Is it Chinese New Year already? It sounds so cliché to ask where this year has gone, but how is it possible this much time has already elapsed? In one short week I will be celebrating the Year of the Tiger in the streets of Beijing amongst millions of people. This only reminds me I have been neglecting my blogging duties and have not written anything about how I spent my own holiday season. The shame has eaten me up inside, so I now feel it my duty to fill you in on the highlights from Halloween to New Years with a top-ten-style recap.
1. Student Halloween party – slap on some wings, antennas, and cheap pink eye shadow, and step back folks, we have a butterfly! The students went ape shit for it and snapped photos non-stop until my cheeks ached from smiling. I was roped into singing "Ghost Busters", was abandoned by the other foreign teachers, forgot the words, and made a complete ass of myself. I think some of my lyrics may have included “If you’re in China, and you’re feelin’ finah, who you gonna call?”
2. Halloween night – Mortified from earlier performance; must console myself by drinking too much vodka.
3. Thanksgiving Shopping – What to do for Thanksgiving when there is no oven in sight? Say to hell with tradition, that's what! Another teacher and I went shopping and ended up coming home with way more than necessary – became mildly excited at the foreign food store and bought 4 different types of cheese. We walked out of the store with a crap load of groceries. Apparently we needed more people – or sturdier bags. Broke the eggs and had to go back a second time.
4. Thanksgiving Dinner – The menu: chicken stew, tacos, burnt mashed potatoes (that was my fault), potato salad, fruit salad, cheesy broccoli, our own concoction of stuffing, store bought cake, and beer. Another teacher and I slaved away all day over three hot plates and a microwave. Burnt potatoes aside, I must say it turned out quite nicely. All the teachers gathered together on Dan’s purple couch to gormandize on our untraditional feast and give thanks for 18 hour work weeks!
5. The Christmas Apples – Christmas isn’t really a big thing in China, with the exception of a few strands of tinsel and some unfortunate looking Santa heads floating about. The one thing they for sure do on Christmas is fruit. So apples are the fruit of safety in China, and therefore it is customary to give them as Christmas gifts to friends and teachers. But not just ordinary apples – apples wrapped in decorative paper! So thanks to my lovely students, I now have more apples than I know what do with! If only there was an oven here to make apple pie. God I miss baked goods.
6. Holiday Parties – Or should I say “parties.” Is it a party if it’s mandatory and all you can think about is stabbing your own eyes out with the dull end of a chopstick? There were three parties this season – one for just the foreigners at our college, one for all the teachers at our college, and one for all the foreigners in Shijiazhuang. The first was sweet – just the foreign teachers, some awesome students, and the song “We Wish you a Merry Christmas” on repeat. The large parties, however, were full of lots of kiss-ass speeches and loads of crap performances (I can say this because my friends and I were one of them). Folks, boredom does not even begin to cover it. I think time might have actually been going backwards. To be fair, however, I do have to admit the food was pretty good, and it was actually kind of fun to rock out to “I’m a Believer” on stage.
7. Christmas Eve – This is the one time I’ve missed American schools – I had to work on Christmas Eve. Although I was showing the movie Elf with Chinese subtitles so it didn’t really feel like working. P.S. After 9 times of watching Will Ferrell fill the residents of New York City with Christmas spirit, I really thought I might kill myself. After work, I went to a Christmas tree decorating competition held by the students, which turned out to be really cute. It was the first time that it really felt like Christmas to me since I’d been in China. I made spaghetti for a few friends, and then we proceeded to go to a bar since we had nothing better to do. At home I would have been watching The Grinch and baking cookies, but alas there was no Grinch and no oven in sight. Wow, my Grandma might have had a point when she told me I reference drinking too often...
8. Christmas Day – Something feels strange; there are no younger brothers knocking at the door begging me to get up. As much as I usually begrudge being woken up, I really really missed them. It was quite peculiar waking up to an empty apartment, and a smidge on the lonely side. Luckily, the apartment was soon buzzing – Richard came down and we made breakfast, and then people began traipsing in and exchanging Secret Santa gifts. I had no Secret Santa gift to open because my room mate drew my name and couldn’t wait until Christmas to give me my gift: it was a nice wallet because I lost mine. Please don’t tell her I’ve lost this one too. Lucky for me, my extremely generous family spent way too much money on postage and had presents shipped to me by Christmas. Thank you everyone, you made my day! I just want to add that I really and truly missed all of you. The rest of Christmas day was complete with lounging, eating pizza, and napping. It was unconventional to say the least, but all in all not too bad.
9. New Year’s Eve – Resolutions have been made and plans are in place. I’ve always been unable to say no, so I have reluctantly accepted an invitation to spend an invitation with Nadya and her friends. She and her friends are all great people, but as a non-Russian speaker, I am in a very small minority. I spend the majority of the evening having no idea what was being said, watching horrible Russian television, and trying to stay awake until midnight. I must be getting old, because I would have much rather spent my New Year’s Eve curled up in bed watching old episodes of 30 Rock until I passed out.
10. New Year’s Day – Aha! I have managed to maintain my glorious tradition of sleeping in and lounging around all day in my sweatpants. It’s nice to know that some things won’t change no matter what country you may be in. I have a personal tradition on January 1st to reflect on the past year. It seems so strange to me that I am now in China; one year ago the idea of picking up and moving across the world had not yet entered my mind. It’s funny how life works out sometimes. Happy New Year everyone; make it a good one.
Tuesday, February 23, 2010
Bo'ao...Saved the Best for Last!
So, on our list of vacation accomplishments, we have officially checked off the following: Tiananmen Square, Great Wall, cheap hostel with crappy bed, expensive hotel complete with 2 days of pool side lounging, and skin-hungry fish. What’s next on the list? A 5 day stay at a quaint little town called Bo’ao, so named for a creature named Ao, who allegedly possess the head of a dragon, body of a turtle, and tail of a lion. All I can say is ouch on behalf of his mother. A few years back this town had yet to make it on a map, let alone a tourist guidebook, but that was before it had hosted the Asian Forum for something something. My attention to details is impressive, I know. Since then, people have been flocking to this humble and charming fishing village, eager for some peace, quiet, and authenticity. I read about Bo’ao in Lonely Planet, and I am easily influenced, so I booked it immediately.
Compromising between a cheap hostel and an expensive touristy hotel, Barrett and I opt to stay at a Bed and Breakfast run by an American woman and her Chinese husband. The B &B is fantastic. The breakfasts superb. The owners are lovely. (Although, is it normal to feed your pet bird chewed up food from your own mouth?) No other foreigners, no photo ops, no giant tourist traps, and we are just minutes from the beach. But this beach, unlike the ones in Sanya, is dotted with ancient temples, wild goats, and families’ dogs, rather than women trying to sell knock-off pearls. Holy hell, this is the vacation spot I’ve been looking for: a real blend of culture, relaxation, and Western breakfasts. God Bless Bo’ao.
I know I’m gushing, but I have fallen in love with this town. How could life get any better? Waking up to a hot, fresh meal, walking along the isolated beach, talking to locals, hiking through minority villages, lounging around reading a book, eating cheap barbecued seafood, chewing on sugar cane… this is the life. Oh, and get this! Bo’ao is home to a beautiful Buddhist temple that is currently off limits to tourists. Turns out, the owner of the B & B has the hook up and is in tight with one of the monks. We end up having a private tea ceremony with the monk and then have a private viewing of the temple while the monks are busy praying and chanting in the background. And this is after a private boat ride up and down the river and visiting a local village only accessible by water. I’m telling you, this place is amazing!
So I realize that there are no humorous or stupid incidents to report, and the sole purpose of this blog is purely to prattle on and on about my new favorite place in China. I can’t help it! This is by far my favorite few days of the trip and I need to brag about it! I assure you that inevitably I will do something ridiculous or embarrassing and will fill you in on all the humiliating/entertaining details, but for now, my infatuation will have to suffice.
Compromising between a cheap hostel and an expensive touristy hotel, Barrett and I opt to stay at a Bed and Breakfast run by an American woman and her Chinese husband. The B &B is fantastic. The breakfasts superb. The owners are lovely. (Although, is it normal to feed your pet bird chewed up food from your own mouth?) No other foreigners, no photo ops, no giant tourist traps, and we are just minutes from the beach. But this beach, unlike the ones in Sanya, is dotted with ancient temples, wild goats, and families’ dogs, rather than women trying to sell knock-off pearls. Holy hell, this is the vacation spot I’ve been looking for: a real blend of culture, relaxation, and Western breakfasts. God Bless Bo’ao.
I know I’m gushing, but I have fallen in love with this town. How could life get any better? Waking up to a hot, fresh meal, walking along the isolated beach, talking to locals, hiking through minority villages, lounging around reading a book, eating cheap barbecued seafood, chewing on sugar cane… this is the life. Oh, and get this! Bo’ao is home to a beautiful Buddhist temple that is currently off limits to tourists. Turns out, the owner of the B & B has the hook up and is in tight with one of the monks. We end up having a private tea ceremony with the monk and then have a private viewing of the temple while the monks are busy praying and chanting in the background. And this is after a private boat ride up and down the river and visiting a local village only accessible by water. I’m telling you, this place is amazing!
So I realize that there are no humorous or stupid incidents to report, and the sole purpose of this blog is purely to prattle on and on about my new favorite place in China. I can’t help it! This is by far my favorite few days of the trip and I need to brag about it! I assure you that inevitably I will do something ridiculous or embarrassing and will fill you in on all the humiliating/entertaining details, but for now, my infatuation will have to suffice.
Thursday, February 4, 2010
Winter Vacation Part One!
Finals are over, grades have been posted, visas obtained. I now have 6 days of blissful nothingness before my winter extravaganza begins. Don’t get me wrong, I’m ecstatic for the 5 week vacation I’m about to embark on. But I, much like everyone, am reveling in some much needed down time. Many friends of mine have traveled to Harbin – a city so cold that tourists’ nipples have been rumored to freeze and fall right off. I myself opted to stay in Shijiazhuang and prep for my upcoming vacation. As a compulsive list maker, I have already made detailed and categorized lists of where I will be staying, and everything I could possibly need. Now all I have to do is pack, and have an endless Lost marathon until Barrett arrives on the 16th. I’m aware that the TV show Lost has been a pop culture staple for the past 6 years, but I’m a little behind the times and am just now starting to watch Season 3. ADDICTING. I blame China and its ridiculously cheap pirated DVDs.
Now the morning of the 16th has arrived, and it’s a day I’ve been waiting for since I first got here. Barrett is coming to China and let me tell you, I have missed this guy. I have been counting down to this day for a few months now, and it’s actually here. Intending to be awesome, I plan it so my train will arrive a few hours before his plane gets in and I can greet him at the gate and it will be running towards each other in slow motion awesomeness. In reality, I couldn’t find the subway and he ends up waiting at the Airport Starbucks for me for an hour. The best laid plans of mice and men…
So, we check into our hotel and order over priced room service and yada yada, fast forward to the next morning. On the agenda today: Tiananmen Square, Forbidden City, and Beihai Park. So, after a full day of sight-seeing, I get the impression that Barrett might be just slightly overwhelmed by the throngs of Chinese people staring, soliciting their tacky crap, and asking us to pose for photo ops. For a laid back guy who enjoys all that is mellow, this was all a bit intrusive. He was managing ok until on the way to dinner we stepped off the subway and into a fresh pile of someone’s puke. I did a little ice skating maneuver through the vomit mound and ended up with chunky splatter all the way up to my knees. I mean, really! What a way to start a nice evening at the Outback. And you don’t have to worry, I will not turn this blog into an homage to my favorite western restaurant, but believe me, I could.
So after eating my deliciously seared prime rib with an all inclusive baked potato and heavenly Caesar salad topped with freshly made croutons, we decide to call it an early night. Why, you ask? Because at 6:20 am we are departing for the Great Wall! Thinking a challenge would be fun, we choose the Simatai section of the Wall. Simatai is the farthest from Beijing, the least touristy, and also the least restored and also the most vigorous section. Looking back, I probably should have taken into account that Barrett and I are both semi-lazy and out of shape, but hind sight is 20/20. The Great Wall is by far one of the most spectacular things I’ve ever seen. Pictures do not do it justice, and the brochures were right: there were no other tourists. The views are picturesque, and being there really makes you stop and appreciate the 200 years it took to build this massive fortress. That being said, the Wall is a wee pain in the ass. It is steep, stairs alternate between ridiculously tiny to insanely large within a span of 4 seconds, and I almost lost my footing numerous times. My classes at the university may be held on the 6th floor of the building, but those daily 5 flight hikes did not prepare me for the workout of the Great Wall. Note to future self: get off ass and do some exercise or you will regret it in the midst of sight-seeing activities.
So with sore and quivering calves we return to our hotel to prep for the 2nd leg of our journey. We are headed to Hainan Island; the Hawaii of Asia. The northern section of the island is a more cultural and realistic portrayal of China, and the southern section being the resort/tropical paradise portion. Being a bit of a traveling snob, I want to go to the northern section to soak up the true experience of China and not just lounge on the beach with a daiquiri in hand like some spoiled tourist. I lasted 3 days before I thought, “To hell with this. I want my daiquiri.” Haikou was an alright city, but the weather was gloomy, the streets were dirty, and the mattress at the hostel rivaled with concrete for comfort. People kept raving about the city of Sanya, so we booked a room at the only available hotel, The Holiday Inn, and made the journey south.
I hate to admit it, but give me tropical drinks by the pool side any day. Life in Sanya is mostly devoid of authentic Chinese culture, but a few days by the beach and tropical poolside is good for the soul. The highlights of Sanya include gorgeous views, swimming in the ocean, drinking cocktails on the beach with a background of fireworks, and a bed that is not rock solid. So what could possibly be the downside to this tropical paradise? For starters, the prices here are exorbitant. The first shock to my system is a $50 laundry bill. I thought they would stick the clothes in the washer and hang them out to dry….but nope, they press them and wrap each article of clothing in sealed plastic. Is it just me, or is that not only bad for the environment but also ridiculously inconvenient? Everything, ranging from taxi rides to meals, is jacked up about 4 times the price it would normally be on the mainland. I guess all good things come at a price, and if tourists are willing to pay it, why not? I also thought it would be a kick in the pants to try new things, so I pay to hang out in a hot spring where “fish doctors” nibble at my dead skin for half an hour until I emerge silky and smooth. I’m not sure what was going on in my head when I deemed this a good idea. I pay for half an hour, and I make it about 6 minutes; in those 6 minutes I get out at least 3 or 4 times. Never ever ever again. In another effort to be cool and embrace the island life, I order a coconut to drink from, and much to my dismay it tastes like bath water. I suppose not all aspects of tropical paradise are meant to be awesome.
The last item on the agenda is to go to Sanya’s famous location, “The End of the Earth.” This beach was once thought to be the most remote corner of the planet, and drew the attention of poets, writers, and admirers alike. As the story goes, it was on this beach that two forbidden lovers of the Romeo and Juliet fashion were forced to jump in the sea and were struck by lightning thus turning them into stone. The lovers/rocks are now intertwined in the ocean for all eternity, destined to be a tourist hot spot for all time. Being here I can appreciate the beauty that once drew the scholars and artists, but it’s a bit hard to appreciate it with the thousands of Chinese tourists mulling about. And they have to pose in front of EVERYTHING. Any enjoyment that could have been experienced from this magnificent scene is thwarted by Chinese families stopping every 8 seconds for a photo op with their peace signs a blazin'. Of course with the peace signs. Always with the peace signs. I am suddenly remembering why I avoid places like this, and now I am craving the quiet, cheap food, and a little bit of authenticity. Cue the last leg of the trip with Barrett: the small fishing village of Bo’ao, so awesome that I think it merits its own blog.
Now the morning of the 16th has arrived, and it’s a day I’ve been waiting for since I first got here. Barrett is coming to China and let me tell you, I have missed this guy. I have been counting down to this day for a few months now, and it’s actually here. Intending to be awesome, I plan it so my train will arrive a few hours before his plane gets in and I can greet him at the gate and it will be running towards each other in slow motion awesomeness. In reality, I couldn’t find the subway and he ends up waiting at the Airport Starbucks for me for an hour. The best laid plans of mice and men…
So, we check into our hotel and order over priced room service and yada yada, fast forward to the next morning. On the agenda today: Tiananmen Square, Forbidden City, and Beihai Park. So, after a full day of sight-seeing, I get the impression that Barrett might be just slightly overwhelmed by the throngs of Chinese people staring, soliciting their tacky crap, and asking us to pose for photo ops. For a laid back guy who enjoys all that is mellow, this was all a bit intrusive. He was managing ok until on the way to dinner we stepped off the subway and into a fresh pile of someone’s puke. I did a little ice skating maneuver through the vomit mound and ended up with chunky splatter all the way up to my knees. I mean, really! What a way to start a nice evening at the Outback. And you don’t have to worry, I will not turn this blog into an homage to my favorite western restaurant, but believe me, I could.
So after eating my deliciously seared prime rib with an all inclusive baked potato and heavenly Caesar salad topped with freshly made croutons, we decide to call it an early night. Why, you ask? Because at 6:20 am we are departing for the Great Wall! Thinking a challenge would be fun, we choose the Simatai section of the Wall. Simatai is the farthest from Beijing, the least touristy, and also the least restored and also the most vigorous section. Looking back, I probably should have taken into account that Barrett and I are both semi-lazy and out of shape, but hind sight is 20/20. The Great Wall is by far one of the most spectacular things I’ve ever seen. Pictures do not do it justice, and the brochures were right: there were no other tourists. The views are picturesque, and being there really makes you stop and appreciate the 200 years it took to build this massive fortress. That being said, the Wall is a wee pain in the ass. It is steep, stairs alternate between ridiculously tiny to insanely large within a span of 4 seconds, and I almost lost my footing numerous times. My classes at the university may be held on the 6th floor of the building, but those daily 5 flight hikes did not prepare me for the workout of the Great Wall. Note to future self: get off ass and do some exercise or you will regret it in the midst of sight-seeing activities.
So with sore and quivering calves we return to our hotel to prep for the 2nd leg of our journey. We are headed to Hainan Island; the Hawaii of Asia. The northern section of the island is a more cultural and realistic portrayal of China, and the southern section being the resort/tropical paradise portion. Being a bit of a traveling snob, I want to go to the northern section to soak up the true experience of China and not just lounge on the beach with a daiquiri in hand like some spoiled tourist. I lasted 3 days before I thought, “To hell with this. I want my daiquiri.” Haikou was an alright city, but the weather was gloomy, the streets were dirty, and the mattress at the hostel rivaled with concrete for comfort. People kept raving about the city of Sanya, so we booked a room at the only available hotel, The Holiday Inn, and made the journey south.
I hate to admit it, but give me tropical drinks by the pool side any day. Life in Sanya is mostly devoid of authentic Chinese culture, but a few days by the beach and tropical poolside is good for the soul. The highlights of Sanya include gorgeous views, swimming in the ocean, drinking cocktails on the beach with a background of fireworks, and a bed that is not rock solid. So what could possibly be the downside to this tropical paradise? For starters, the prices here are exorbitant. The first shock to my system is a $50 laundry bill. I thought they would stick the clothes in the washer and hang them out to dry….but nope, they press them and wrap each article of clothing in sealed plastic. Is it just me, or is that not only bad for the environment but also ridiculously inconvenient? Everything, ranging from taxi rides to meals, is jacked up about 4 times the price it would normally be on the mainland. I guess all good things come at a price, and if tourists are willing to pay it, why not? I also thought it would be a kick in the pants to try new things, so I pay to hang out in a hot spring where “fish doctors” nibble at my dead skin for half an hour until I emerge silky and smooth. I’m not sure what was going on in my head when I deemed this a good idea. I pay for half an hour, and I make it about 6 minutes; in those 6 minutes I get out at least 3 or 4 times. Never ever ever again. In another effort to be cool and embrace the island life, I order a coconut to drink from, and much to my dismay it tastes like bath water. I suppose not all aspects of tropical paradise are meant to be awesome.
The last item on the agenda is to go to Sanya’s famous location, “The End of the Earth.” This beach was once thought to be the most remote corner of the planet, and drew the attention of poets, writers, and admirers alike. As the story goes, it was on this beach that two forbidden lovers of the Romeo and Juliet fashion were forced to jump in the sea and were struck by lightning thus turning them into stone. The lovers/rocks are now intertwined in the ocean for all eternity, destined to be a tourist hot spot for all time. Being here I can appreciate the beauty that once drew the scholars and artists, but it’s a bit hard to appreciate it with the thousands of Chinese tourists mulling about. And they have to pose in front of EVERYTHING. Any enjoyment that could have been experienced from this magnificent scene is thwarted by Chinese families stopping every 8 seconds for a photo op with their peace signs a blazin'. Of course with the peace signs. Always with the peace signs. I am suddenly remembering why I avoid places like this, and now I am craving the quiet, cheap food, and a little bit of authenticity. Cue the last leg of the trip with Barrett: the small fishing village of Bo’ao, so awesome that I think it merits its own blog.
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