A day in the life

So I found a real café in Shijiazhuang, and not the crappy chicken/tea restaurant that I was using as a second rate substitution. This café has great big plush couches, exotic teas, a piano player, and a variety of over-priced foods to munch on. It’s everything a café should be. Unfortunately, the only reason I found this place was because I was taken there on a job interview. Or at least that’s what the guy told me it would be. Turns out, not a job interview, but a “date” with a pervy married guy who has a son named Obama. It did not matter how many times I told this guy I was involved/ not interested/would never be interested/would rather date an orangutan, he would just wink conspiratorially and tell me he understood my need to keep things secret. I just wanted to meet and learn how make an extra few bucks on the weekend, and instead the evening turned into the longest hour and a half of my life. I highly regret not bringing enough cash to pay for my own taxi ride home so I could bust the hell out of there, but live and learn is my motto. But on the upside I now have a new kick ass café where I can write my blogs in peace.

At the moment I’m taking a break from planning lessons to write about the current goings-on in China. Most of my students are preparing for a crazy important exam; if they don’t pass this test then their degree is about as useful as toilet paper. On second thought, toilet paper is pretty useful, but I think you get where I’m going with this. As a result, they are on edge, cranky, and very difficult to please right now. If we do test preparation, they find this stressful and overwhelming. If we play games to help practice their English then it’s not useful and it’s beneath them. I can’t win at the moment so I’ve given up trying to please everyone. I suppose that if I were in their shoes I’d be crapping myself too, so I’m going to cut them a little slack. I’m just hoping they go back to their happy-go-lucky selves soon enough. The week after the test I promised them a movie to celebrate – this is a big reward for them. Although, after having to watch Elf nine times in one week, I’ve learned my lesson-show different movies to different classes.

So other than dealing with grumpy students, life in China is going along swimmingly. The weather is improving and every once in a while, blue skies have been peaking through the thick haze of smog. Warm weather is approaching, although you’d never know it by the way Chinese people are dressed. Weather that I would deem worthy of capri pants and t-shirts is still long sleeves and jacket weather to them. Chinese people are deathly afraid of cold. I’m not making this up. Very few of them drink cold water – it’s always hot. They also are adamantly against fans/air conditioning/etc. In fact, they have glass suction type massages for the sole purpose of removing the “cold” that is trapped in your body. I received this treatment my very first week in China, and as a result my back looked liked a demented Twister game. I get the biggest kick out of watching students freak out when I wear a short sleeved shirt to class. They audibly gasp like I just came in naked, or like I denounced Chairman Mao. Ahhh, their Mao obsession – that’s a topic about which I could write an entire blog; but that’s a tangent for another day. Back to the topic at hand – the warm weather. My favorite part of this weather? Glad you asked. The outdoor barbeques are back. For under $5 a few of us can sit outside and eat lamb kabobs, fried bread, chicken wings, and grilled veggies. It’s positively one of my favorite things to do on a nice warm evening. Afterwards you can stroll down the street and get skewered fruit kabobs for about 10 cents. There’s something about cheap. fresh fruit on every corner that just makes life a little bit better.

Any other news in China? Well, I had a 4 day weekend last weekend so I only worked about 10 hours last week. Ha, I can feel the death glares. Last weekend was Tomb Sweeping Holiday so students had a Monday off of work and school to honor the dead. Here’s a trivial tidbit for you – Chinese people wear white to funerals. I tell you I’m learning something new every day! On my day off I had an invitation for a day trip with students that I only accepted because I didn’t know how to say no. As it turns out, I’m really glad I went. I was mildly skeptical at first, because Chinese people have a relatively different concept of what constitutes as fun. After all, these are the students who report back every week about spending their weekends playing computer games and chatting on the internet to their friends in the next dormitory. But wouldn’t you know it, these students busted out their wild sides to take me to see the oldest bridge in the history of the world.

We had to meet at 7:30 am which is still the middle of the night, but I guess it’s necessary to get up that early when you have to transfer buses 3 times. So a group of 7 students and I, along with my British friend Fiona, took a 2 hour journey to a nearby county. Students were hoping to see the pear trees blossoming, but we were about 3 weeks too early for that. Plan B: Check out a nearby temple and watch a procession of monks. I’ve seen a lot of temples, and it’s true they all start to meld together after a while, but this one happened to be spectacularly beautiful. When it comes down to it, a nice morning checking out a quiet temple beats sleeping in and surfing our ridiculously slow internet.

So after the temple we take a tuk-tuk ride to the infamous Zhao Zhou Bridge. Students, in their attempt to be helpful, wanted me to get in for half price so they lent me a student ID card. Did you know that I don’t look Chinese and that I cannot successfully pass off for someone named Wang Mengmeng? This bridge better rock my world, because I just paid full price. So, its big claim to fame is being the oldest arch bridge in the history of bridges. I guess it’s kind of cool, in its own first bridge kind of way. Although, it quickly loses its luster after about four and a half minutes. Never fear, there is shopping, and picnics and boat rides, oh my! Boat riding wasn’t my idea, but if 7 students want to paddle in some smelly and murky water, who am I to kill the dream? And bless ‘em, they rowed their hearts out. True, my students were equivalent to the Special Olympics rowing team, and I doubt they’ll be going out for crew any time soon, but they are just so damn cute! You can’t help but love them and their hearts of gold.

In other news, I am still on a quest to make the most of my last few months in China. I went hiking this weekend at a local mountain, and when I say hiking I mean stair climbing. There is nothing remotely natural about the paths up mountains in China. It’s all man-made steps, and after about half an hour my ass is completely on fire. Luckily it’s quite pretty and nice to get out of the city, but I miss Mount Rainier, and trails, and winding paths sans litter. And this is the first time I’ve ever seen hikers smoking as they puff and hack their way up the mountain. Hiking, like everything else in China, is back-asswards from what I’m used to. But the cherry blossoms are blooming, the Chinese hikers are friendly, and I am definitely sculpting my calves. The pretty awesome cherry on the mountain-shaped-sundae is the temple that’s in the process of being built at the top. I’ve never seen the temple process in action, and we got to meet the architect and designer of the religious statues. I’m glad I checked out this mountain before they turn it into an expensive tourist trap.

I think that about sums up the most interesting things going on in my life at the moment. I’m still studying my Chinese with the help of some Chinese friends and an illegally downloaded copy of Rosetta Stone. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again, but God Bless China’s pirating opportunities! Anyways, I can speak a handful of relevant Chinese phrases- nothing brag-worthy, but I’ve been able to make do and speak some very limited conversations. Other than that, I’m planning on hitting up the Botanical Gardens and a hanging temple next weekend. Hopefully within a few weeks I’ll have more updates for you on the awesomeness that is my life in China.